Online Dating–Intimidating for Plus Size Women?

Online Dating–Intimidating for Plus Size Women?

Recently, a coworker confessed that she had all but lost hope that there were some good men out there. A bitter divorce years ago, a cross-country relocation, and a substantial weight gain from emotional eating had eroded her confidence. Linnea, a gorgeous blond woman with a heart of gold, emerald eyes, and a gentle and compassionate way about her, was so sure that no man would look at her because of her size, she had developed an palpable air of resignation. Like a bubble, she carried this around with her, unaware of all the possibilities she was allowing to pass her by.

Sitting over coffee one morning, Linnea, a health professional, mentioned that she had felt, for the first time in years, a glint of hope while talking to a patient’s son. His friendly, non- threatening and open manner, devotion to his father, coupled with down-home good looks, caught her attention. She acknowledged that although he was likely attached, and unavailable to her, meeting him had opened her eyes to the possibility that there were other good men out there.

When I asked her, smiling, if she was thinking about letting me help her make a dating profile, she flinched, and told me she wasn’t quite ready yet. She told me that no man would want her because of her size. While Linnea may be correct in her assumption that men prefer smaller women, she is quite incorrect that there is no man who would be attracted to her as she is.

Here’s the first secret: It only takes one. One special bit of chemistry, one man who appreciates or prefers larger women, or a man who is intrigued by a reading a woman’s candid and dynamic profile and chooses to take a chance outside of his comfort zone. Just one.

The next secret is that it takes practice to get outside of your comfort zone.

Try this: Instead of meeting your girlfriends for wine tastings, shopping, museums, or movies, try contacting a few men with the intention of practicing the art of flirting, of building your confidence, making a new friend. Realistically, while most people aren’t perusing dating sites for friendship, you can choose to get your feet wet by starting slow (or at any pace of your choosing). If this is too hard, consider taking extra time with your appearance, wear your favorite shoes, get your claws done, and take yourself on a solo date of your choice. Practice being out, and carry yourself with confidence.  Tell yourself that the negative voices that are renting space in your head are no longer welcome. Boot ‘em out!

The third secret? What you will discover, after stretching yourself, is that success builds confidence, and confidence attracts others.

If you enjoyed this article, please share it on google+. Thanks a lot! =)

if you need a little dating service, ( http://www.bbwmeeting.org ) could be the perfect match for your FREE online dating. This site offers live support and dating counselors to provide you with advice and guidance. You'll also find dating ideas, greeting cards, online forums, even daily news that's relevant to BBW relationships and dating. It costs nothing to place a profile on this website, and there are already hundreds of thousands of members who have profiles that you may peruse.